Thanks to Kevin’s shoutout, I’m reminded of something else that sucks about commercials. I can’t even begin to describe how much I hate the car commercial that uses Led Zeppelin’s “Rock and Roll.” Oh, did I say “commercial”? I meant “commercial after commercial after motherfucking commercial.” Seriously, I think it spread like SARS and now every single car commercial that isn’t that girl poplocking in the passenger seat uses that song in the background. Why am I so angry about this? Because I LOVE Led Zeppelin, and “Rock and Roll” is an amazingly rocking song, and now every time I listen to it I think of freaking midsize luxury cars and it might as well be “Takin’ Care of Business” or that “bbbbaby you just ain’t seen nnnothin yet” song or Bob Seger’s “Like a Rock.” It’s like it’s been infected. When this happened to songs like “Revolution” or “Lust for Life” or “London Calling” you could laugh it off, because the original songs were so diametrically opposed to what the commercials are about that your mind maintains the disconnect despite the efforts of the commercials. But with “Rock and Roll,” the commercial isn’t saying “use these sneakers and you’ll be able to fight the nihilistic impulses of student radicals” or “go on this cruise and you’ll kick heroin” or “buy this Jaguar and you’ll watch as the inevitable final conflict between capitalism and communism destroys Europe”–it’s saying “drive this car and you’ll have a good time.” It’s just believable enough to lodge in your head and make you think of the song whenever you’re having a mildly good time driving five miles over the speed limit down a sidestreet, which is basically completely poisonous if you want to ever legitimately enjoy this song ever again. No-good bastards. I seriously, seriously hope you all die.
